Say Something...

I've been asked to provide a list of potential songs for Marcus' 21st birthday. The catch is, no current popular music is allowed, so no Veronicas for you unfortunately. The bulk of the list is meant to be from the 80s or before and hopefully the worse the song the better chance it has of making the list. To get things going, I decided the best place to start would be the Triple M 2007 Countdown, the home of the ever shifting playlist playing classic rock with room to spare for Ashlee Simpson. Here is a list of what I can come with so far.

(Since I started typing this several weeks ago, it has come to my attention that I might have to start looking for dodgy 90s music instead. For now crap 80s music will have to do... It's just as fun but with more synths.)

• Africa, Toto
  A song that has nothing to do with the continent in question as far as I can tell.
  
  
• The Touch, Stan Bush
  From the soundtrack to the original Transformers movie. At random points in my day I will start humming the riff to see how many people join in. It's worked once so far.
  
  
• Wouldn't It Be Good, Nik Kershaw
  The Nik Kershaw in the Outback sketch by Tony Martin uses this song among other Kersh' hits to try and relieve drought stricken farmers doing it tough on the land, all while playing three synthesisers. Amazing.
  
  
• We Built This City, Jefferson Starship
  According to Shaun Micallef, we should really doubt anyone who attempts to construct an entire city based on rock n' roll. Their architectural credentials really do need further scrutiny.
  
  
• The Heat Is On, Glenn Frey
  Off the Beverly Hills Cop Soundtrack apparently. I wouldn't know, I haven't seen it in years.
  
  
• Evil Woman, ELO
  Falsetto is easily the best and most entertaining form of vocals ever invented in the history of music. As the Americans might say, Period.
  
  
• Out Of Touch, Hall & Oats
  I'm not sure why I like this song, I mean until it popped up on the countdown I didn't even know who sang it. But the video is a bit silly with some UT 'PANCAKE!!' action going on at the start.
  
  
  
  
• Don't Pay The Ferryman, Chris De Burgh
  I knew I would love this song when the cry of "Ahhh-ahhh!!" rang through the speakers. The clip is pretty funny too, it has a ferryman and everything... videos were so much more literal back then, not like the arty farty stuff they serve up today.
  
  
• Freeze Frame - J Geils Band
  I only like this song for the synth organ intro, it's a strangely catchy use of a single note being pressed repeatedly for about 30 seconds.
  
  
• I'd Do Anything For Love - Meatloaf
  It's this or Bat Out Of Hell for mine.
  
  
• Look Of Love - ABC
  What more can I say about this song that hasn't been said already?
  
  
• We're Not Gonna Take It - Twisted Sister
  This one is pretty cheesy along with the rest of them but is worth mentioning for the film clip where the drill sergeant dad who falls out of a lot of windows thanks to the awesome power of rock.
  
  
  
  
• Hip To Be Square - Huey Lewis And The News
  Really any Huey Lewis song from the 80s will do (even that awful one from Duets with Gwyneth Paltrow?) though I like this one all because of the version they did on Sesame Street, "Hip To Be A Square" which teaches kids about shapes.
  
  
• Taking It To The Streets - Doobie Brothers
  Unfortunately this was made in 1976 so no dice. Sounds very 80s though, could've fooled me.
  
  
• Flash - Queen
  "FLASH! AHHH-AHHH!!! Saviour of the Universe!" leads to one of the best movie soundtracks in existence.
  
  
• Hold The Line - Toto
  Another Toto song, oh how the hits keep on coming.
  
  
• Take On Me - a-ha
  Hopefully you've seen the clip for this song, or perhaps you've seen the parody on Family Guy. If you were able to see past the obscure reference of course.
  
  
  
  
• Don't Stop Believing - Journey
  The last song played on The Sopranos before the famous non-ending.
  
  
• Anything by Bon Jovi... there are too many to recall really.
  
  
• We Didn't Start The Fire - Billy Joel
  Let the record show that this is my least favourite song. If you wish to annoy me or drive me into a fit of rage, this is the subliminal trigger you should be playing softly in the background. I'm not paying for the damages though.
  
  
• Relax - Frankie Goes To Hollywood
  Can you name the other song these guys are known for? Marcus and I had a 15 minute conversation about this resulting in most of the ABC back catalogue being quoted. The answer to my question? Only if you must...
  
  
• Blue Monday - New Order
  A classic of sorts, most people have heard of this one in passing though the name didn't really get to me for a while.
  

And perhaps try and make space for these three which have fairly decent cheese properties but I have no time or energy left to type a description for.

• Rock Me Amadeus - Falco

• Antmusic - Adam And The Ants

• Gold - Spandau Ballet

Send all suggestions or hate mail via the email link or shoddily waterproofed time capsule. Join me next time if I need to compile a list of awful 90s songs. The work of N'Sync and friends instantly come to mind for some reason.