Noooo Bingo For You!

You can always tell summer is approaching when the networks wheel out their second, third and Xth tier programming, where X is the level you wish to sink to on any particular evening. This would normally result in the strong stench of cheese clogging our airwaves and this year is no different.

We have shows like The Singing Bee where contestants attempt to karaoke their way through popular music. Admittedly it is pretty funny when they get it wrong, but I'm more impressed by the fact that the band has rehearsed through tens of songs for the one episode. I'd also like to know if someone has counted the number of dance routines those bee girls have. You can only gyrate in so many directions before your pelvis flies off across the stage.

Another new show I gave a shot was that National Bingo Show, in yet another reason for people to not go outside. The bingo halls must be reeling at the vacant seats formerly filled by the elderly, unemployed and various stoners. The show is minorly entertaining, and while I'm sure all the bingo cards are rigged with numbers that don't exist (pi anyone?) or are not inside that giant bingo cage, the best part of the show has to be that Commissioner Gordon, ah I mean whatshisname. (watching too much Batman does have a negative effect I'm told) His cries of 'Noooo bingo!' are probably what makes the show barely watchable in my opinion. If you too can't get enough of it, I suggest you watch this minute long clip and I guarantee you'll be cured in no time.



I haven't decided if it can be construed as being racist yet, though it is interesting to read that the original American version of Bingo Night also has an Indian commissioner, though his 'No bingo is arguably inferior that of our own local production, which you may see here if you care enough. On a quick sidenote, I think it's increasingly sad that localised versions of shows overseas are choosing to remain very much the same as their originals. The formats are protected down to the line, from the stupid black and white striped referee outfits to the choice of host. Perhaps it's a sign that cultural boundaries are starting to blur to the effect that we no longer care everything feels so Americanised.

Though not all is lost. Local productions are starting to pick up in both quantity and occasionally quality. We are still stuck with shows catering to the interests of no one in particular like The Wedge and Comedy Inc. - The Late Shift. Annoyances like Surprise Surprise Gotcha, the only show on TV inspired by a man who uses prank calls as his main gimmick on FM radio, are bound to fail once people realise they have better things to do with their time like shove their remaining limbs into a meat mincer (and that Punk'd probably does it better... if you like that kind of show).

To balance the crappiness of it all, we now have comic saviours in the form of the Chaser and Shaun Micallef. Now everyone knows about the Chaser and their tricks but Newstopia is something different entirely. A half hour take on the week in news done in a way only Micallef could, this is a show that can vary from randomist one liners to truly inspired sketches. It's great to have someone like Micallef back on TV after all this time. The scheduling isn't bad, I can see how they have chosen to ride off the back of the Chaser on Wednesday nights but it'd be nice to have it at a more accessible time. Still, no point complaining.

Not all imported TV is rubbish though, there are certain gems here and there that often get shunted into late evening slots due to their perceived edginess or cult status. A prime example of this is The Sopranos, which wraps up on Nine this week. Understandably it has been difficult for it to gain a mainstream following here given its content, but it really does deserve more attention than it has. It has some of the best dialogue paired with wonderful acting from the ensemble cast, as well as this following death scene from this week's finale as an incentive (or otherwise) for you to watch. This is one of the best whackings I've seen since the show started, and it couldn't happen to a better character... I'm not being sadistic though, so don't go sending me abusive letters like you usually do. If you have ever followed the show you'll know what I mean.



That's about as much television I can dissect for one sitting, so you'll all have to wait until there's enough crap on the tube for me to whinge about. I'm sure it won't take too long...

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