Say Something...

Being without my own private form of transportation, I often have to resort to hitching rides off friends or take a hike to the nearest train or bus stop. It may be a slower way to travel (especially when I have to leave the house 90 minutes before an appointment) and its range may be limited (Frankston is far enough for me, maybe a bit too far), but for the most part it does the job and it allows me to grab some much needed shuteye providing I can get a seat. Though standing in a packed carriage hasn't stopped me from trying. Drooling on someones shoulder is a great conversation starter. You'll thank me when you've found that special someone (take note, Marcus...)

Despite all the negative publicity our public transport system has been copping this year, it hasn't been all bad. Here are a few shots taken to show that trains can be entertaining and intellectually stimulating.

This one was taken during Welly's farewell outing, and shows what can go wrong when a bunch of kids are given a camera. Loyal readers may recognise Peter as the unfortunate victim of camera based sight gags, regarded as the second most juvenile form of humour apart from producing uninspired local sketch comedy.

But I must admit that taking the moral high ground here is mostly useless considering that's my giant disproportionate finger attempting to probe the inner reaches of Peter's nostrils. My, how I've grown! Welly's finger is giving him a nice dewaxing of the ears in the absence of any better explanation.

Just quietly, tell me if you took any notice of the guy in the background trying not to be associated with our immature antics. I suppose appearing in an idiotic photo would put a dampener on anyone's day. I bet he never guessed he'd be on the interweb with all the other junk not unlike the very words I'm typing. That's the fickleness of fame for you. (Actually he was just really tired, but I like to think there was an embarrassment factor there too.)

Before last week, I hadn't laid eyes on that pic for a good six months or so. That must have been one of the last times everyone from the old group at BHHS was together, or at least as together as it could ever be, but that's a story too complex, personal and long winded to be fit for publication. Welly's now floating about in Singapore of all places, and Nathan (not pictured) is heading off at the end of the year to our national capital/politician isolation wasteland. How things change so very quickly.


Or does it?

This was a nice piece of graffiti I chanced upon on my way to my former place of employment. I see a lot of graffiti all over the place both inside and outside the carriage, but this is the first one where I was bored enough to capture it for eternity.

I'm still trying to figure out if the statement above was meant to be sarcastic rather than a definitive affirmation of the author's affinity for the TAFE education system. It could really be one or the other, though I suspect a small bit of cynicism may be in play. After all, there is nothing to be ashamed of in going to TAFE. You probably end up learning more relevant material, unlike the loads of theoretical junk they feed us in the university arena. And you would probably get far more competent teachers running the joint too. Not that I'd know, I kinda just assumed.

Speaking of which, I was at uni the other week trying to find out what the faculty's plans were for the coming year, which is particularly important this year considering Melbourne is in the middle of its very own Great Leap Forward. Being one of the smallest faculties, it was only natural that ABP would be used as a guinea pig. Having the misfortune to be caught in the midst of all this confusion, I needed to find out what was happening with the double degree I was hoping to take.

Anywho, I began asking all the right questions to the nice lady in charge of dispensing such information when she told me the faculty had not decided on a final course structure. For a world class institution you would think they could pull their act together a bit quicker really. TAFE is starting to look a lot more appealing.


But Wait, There's More!
The final act of this narrative sees me on the train home at Flinders on a Saturday night after seeing the Melbourne Uni Law Revue with Keyur and some friends of his. The show was pretty good, though arguably not as good as the previous year. Highlights included several Harry Potter inspired sketches where they rapped their way through the major plot developments and one hilariously wrong dubbing of a scene from Chamber of Secrets where Hagrid appears to show more than a platonic interest in Hermione. ("You know what they say, invest a little now so when they grow up it all comes back... with interest")

Being youth driven contemporary comedy, there was a certain degree of jokes of the cruder nature. I have no problem with the vast majority of it, but I really wanted to know what was going on inside the heads of the older folk sitting in the row in front of us. I like to think they were the parents of the cast, wondering where they went wrong in all their years of tough love parenting. I think it's back to the basement for you, young man!

Heading back to my late night train trip, I needed something to pass the time while waiting 15 minutes for the next train. Chocolate bars were tempting and all, but I could not go past the sexed up hype of the new Chupa Chups. Three flavours for the low low price of one? And how could I resist the advertorial charms of a homicidal lollipop stick? (You've seen the ads I'm sure) You tell me...


Yes that's right folks, the people at the Chupa Chup factory have been deceiving us all this time. They promised three, but could only produce two when it really mattered. This is truly a case for Consumer Affairs or heck, even ACA can get their claws into this one. Imagine that, the story of a simple young man who just wanted a piece of candy, and ended up broken hearted by an unscrupulous faceless corporate identity. When you can't even trust the candy man, the terrorists have truly won. (No one's said that for a while, I thought I'd just throw that one back into the vernacular)


In closing, what have we learned today? Trains - often late, frustrating, overcrowded, understaffed, but occasionally makes for semi interesting blog fodder. Hurrah for the silver lining!